Pilgrim: Let's sail away to a far away land.

Me and my Joint Crop lover, Harry, have joined the merchant marine to travel for a year around Cape Horn, working with other men like ourselves. We don't exactly fit in with regular people. But we fit in with the men on the brig Pilgrim.

Our paranoid captain has us spying on his second mate - a former lover whom he blames for his fianc?'s suicide. Can we help them reconcile? The huge Prussian sailor, Wolfie, is training us and flirting. Can we help him retrieve his brith certificate from an actual witch in Puerta Vallarta?

Meanwhile, the second mate and the captain's present squeeze, his steward, go ashore to do business and hook up with a Chilean corporal, who sends pirates to rob our cargo. Will we repel their attack and head for San Francisco? And then, do we return the way we came, or jump ship and join thousands of bachelors flooding into the gold rush?